"Life is what happens when we're busy making other plans." The same can be said of the spiritual life.
Who has not found themselves frustrated in some way -- with a relationship, a job, a family problem -- and have caught themselves more and more disconnected from reality and instead living in some idealized future fantasy? Symptoms may include:
1) RETRO-NARRATIVES: Ever listen to your self talk? Do you catch yourself dealing with problems in the present from the perspective of a distant future? Perhaps youve caught yourself more than a few times saying things like "THAT will make a great story one day..."
2) CARICATURIZATION: Perhaps it is a specific person thats got you down, rather than a situation? Another symptom may be the creation of a mental caricature of that difficult person which portrays them as absurd and immutable, rather than humane and susceptible to feelings and redemptive change, just like anybody else. By perceiving people in this way, we have inherently justified our hands-off approach to reality.
3) GOOD HUMOR?: Anyone saying anything critical on the topic of humor is sure to sound like a stick in the mud, but I'll just have to roll the dice on this one... Humor is a great coping mechanism, and of course it is good to laugh at ourselves and about our problems -- but be careful that humor is not being used maliciously. Don't forget the Greek word from which 'sarcasm' is derived literally means 'to tear the flesh' -- contemplate THAT next time you watch The Simpsons! Discern whether humor functions for you in a way that 'makes light of', or if is it fundamentally violent. Never confuse laughter and smiles with goodness without attending to its nature. If it is good, it can help us bridge a rough patch and reconnect us with reality -- as when two people can laugh about a misunderstanding and move on. But if it is destructive, it can alienate us from reality atop a pedestal of smarminess.
It is important to be aware of these signs because our spiritual task is not to avoid reality, but to enter more deeply into it. Only in that way can we create a space for God's healing grace.
Christians espouse a God whom has set the precident for such an approach by having fully entered into the messiness of humanity; having been borne in a stable; lived as an immigrant; ministered to the marginalized and outcast; only to be tortured and publicly executed...
This is not to say that Christian spirituality is masochistic, but our faith does promote a spiritual path that calls for responsibility, forgiveness, and to walk in solidarity with those whom the world despises. Nothing could be more inimical than future escapism, or any escapism for that matter. Future plans and ambitions are fine, but they should not come at the expense of being present to reality. God needs us right where we are.
Whenever I catch myself becoming the escape artist I dread, I pray my favorite lyric from the hymn 'Gather Us In': "Give us the courage to enter the song...."
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