-Jeff Lewis, Nurse Practitioner, from "The Art of Comforting" by Val Walker p.46
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
from "The Art of Comforting"
"Though he (my father) was the one with the illness - the one in pain - he gave US comfort by showing how much we meant to him. He strongly believed in keeping positive, not for himself so much as for others around him. He told me repeatedly 'If you are having a good day, you can make someone's day better. But if you are having a bad day, you can make someone's good day worse.' He taught me we had a great effect on each other's days, for better or worse, with just our demeanor, mood, and outlook. With this short life, he showed me we mattered by making others feel they mattered."
Friday, November 19, 2010
A Prayer for Direction
Jesus said, 'From those to whom much has been given, much will be expected.' Lk12:48
Lord, You've blessed so many of us with prosperity, talent, health, freedom and opportunity.
And You know we are constantly tempted by competing forces; temptations of power, status, pleasure, and wealth...
Give us the strength and wisdom to hear our true calling amidst this cacophony of sirens, and to lay the harvest of our blessings upon Your feet.
Help us become servants of mercy and peace in this broken world.
AMEN
Monday, November 15, 2010
PRAYING WHEN PRAYER BECOMES ELUSIVE
It’s common to have times in our prayer life when prayer feels challenged. It’s happened to the saints, its happened to me, and there’s a good chance it may happen to you.
Here’s what I’ve learned (and am still learning) from the experience.
1] ASK FOR HELP
Most parishes will be able to connect you with a Spiritual Director. They are great for a number of reasons, but with regards to problems in prayer they are vital. The key is accountability. When we let someone else ‘behind the curtain’ of our self, and can share our troubles and struggles in prayer, we can no longer run from the problem--hiding in our work, our busyness, even hiding in our exhaustion. Someone else is there who can ask us frankly, ‘How’s it going? How’s your prayer life?’
2] ACKNOWLEDGE REALITY
When I am struggling I sometimes expect that prayer will just happen again; however this enables me to avoid the arduous work and confrontation with reality that is necessary for true healing to occur.
Let me use a metaphor. If you invited me to supper at your house, I couldn’t get a seat at the table without first knocking at the door. Too often we are impatient and want to go directly to the feast without knocking at the door. But that impatience has to do with denial. We want to deny the factors causing our struggle. We want to deny our problems and just carry on--but then find ourselves surprised to find it no longer working, that we can’t find our seat at the table.
So the point is this: when struggling in prayer, acknowledge this first and foremost in prayer. Purposely and humbly spend time on the doorstep of the house of prayer, knocking, preparing--even pleading. This must be the substance of prayer; acknowledging our spiritual desolation and bringing it before God. Talk to God about it like a friend; “Lord, You know how I’ve been struggling lately. Help me face my fears, my shortcomings.. whatever is blocking me. And even though I feel far from You, help me return like the Prodigal Son. Help me find my way back to prayer...”
Praying for prayer is still a powerful and authentic prayer. Perhaps even more so.
3] THINK BIG PICTURE
Think of the possible meanings behind such struggles. Could God be preparing us for something profound? Perhaps some kind of tragedy is lurking down the road, and by learning how to get through these periods of spiritual aridity we are being prepared to find our way back to God through adversity? Or perhaps we are acquiring the spiritual skills that will help others navigate through their times of spiritual hardship?
And of course there’s always the lesson of gratitude. By dwelling in the darkness of the valley, we will surely appreciate those hard won summits all the more.
Here’s what I’ve learned (and am still learning) from the experience.
1] ASK FOR HELP
Most parishes will be able to connect you with a Spiritual Director. They are great for a number of reasons, but with regards to problems in prayer they are vital. The key is accountability. When we let someone else ‘behind the curtain’ of our self, and can share our troubles and struggles in prayer, we can no longer run from the problem--hiding in our work, our busyness, even hiding in our exhaustion. Someone else is there who can ask us frankly, ‘How’s it going? How’s your prayer life?’
2] ACKNOWLEDGE REALITY
When I am struggling I sometimes expect that prayer will just happen again; however this enables me to avoid the arduous work and confrontation with reality that is necessary for true healing to occur.
Let me use a metaphor. If you invited me to supper at your house, I couldn’t get a seat at the table without first knocking at the door. Too often we are impatient and want to go directly to the feast without knocking at the door. But that impatience has to do with denial. We want to deny the factors causing our struggle. We want to deny our problems and just carry on--but then find ourselves surprised to find it no longer working, that we can’t find our seat at the table.
So the point is this: when struggling in prayer, acknowledge this first and foremost in prayer. Purposely and humbly spend time on the doorstep of the house of prayer, knocking, preparing--even pleading. This must be the substance of prayer; acknowledging our spiritual desolation and bringing it before God. Talk to God about it like a friend; “Lord, You know how I’ve been struggling lately. Help me face my fears, my shortcomings.. whatever is blocking me. And even though I feel far from You, help me return like the Prodigal Son. Help me find my way back to prayer...”
Praying for prayer is still a powerful and authentic prayer. Perhaps even more so.
3] THINK BIG PICTURE
Think of the possible meanings behind such struggles. Could God be preparing us for something profound? Perhaps some kind of tragedy is lurking down the road, and by learning how to get through these periods of spiritual aridity we are being prepared to find our way back to God through adversity? Or perhaps we are acquiring the spiritual skills that will help others navigate through their times of spiritual hardship?
And of course there’s always the lesson of gratitude. By dwelling in the darkness of the valley, we will surely appreciate those hard won summits all the more.
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